It’s been a tale of two weeks for our plucky bettors. One week, Browns beat writer Zac Jackson is bragging to his neighbors about going undefeated. The next, he’s re-examining his life. Chicago columnist Jon Greenberg was getting made fun of in the comments after his Week 1 performance, but he cleaned it up in Week 2. What does this week have in store?
JACKSON (0-4 last week, 3-4 overall): I was an equal opportunity loser last week, and I own it. I’ve changed up my routine — more prayers, more vitamins — and I’m back this week.
In this humbling game, you sometimes have to find any kind of positive, dig for pennies in your car’s center console, and just get back to work. I won my survivor pick, and the Colorado pick was so obviously bad that I only needed to watch five plays before I just turned it off and went to bed.
I’m rested and here to fight the fight. It’s a long season.
GREENBERG (4-1 last week, 6-4 overall): Meanwhile, I had more than a “concept of a plan” last week by only picking NFL games with 3-point spreads. I nearly ran the table, with my only loss coming in Houston’s two-point victory over Indianapolis.
On Friday, I’m flying to fabulous Las Vegas before taking an insanely early flight to Houston on Sunday morning for that evening’s game between the Bears and Texans. I’m flying one of those discount airlines, so I think I have to pay extra for a seatbelt and possibly for them to land the plane on a runway.
This week, I’m just picking games that I can watch in a sportsbook. I’m going with the kinds of guys who are in their mid-40s and already downplaying the concept of “dinner” because they’re going to be “too wasted.” So it won’t be like the last time I was there in March when I was with my family seeing magic shows and going to the Mandalay Bay aquarium.
Any college games for me to bet, or am I on my own?
JACKSON: It’s a really bad college schedule. But there’s a point spread winner or loser in every game, so onward we fight.
Let’s start with UMass +3.5 at Buffalo. (I originally picked this at +4.5.) If you scrape the bottom on your first play, there’s nowhere to go but up, right? UMass actually competed in a 38-23 loss at Toledo last week, and in a meeting here of two teams generally regarded as the nation’s worst, I’ll take the points. There’s no real home-field advantage here, and on a Saturday schedule that’s not visually appealing, I’m going for extra ugly.
As for one you might actually want to watch, how about Colorado State +7? Colorado remains a fascinating watch, even as it’s mostly a fundamentally bad football team. It’s a talented one, though, and in this rivalry game on campus, I’ll take the full touchdown. This game went to double overtime last year when Colorado State was almost a three-score underdog.
GREENBERG: As much as I’d love to bet against the Buffaloes purely on bad vibes, I’ll probably sit this one out.
Colorado State hasn’t covered a spread in their last seven games, though to be fair, they did win three of them as favorites. Meanwhile, Colorado has only covered one game as a favorite in the Deion Sanders era, last year’s win over Nebraska in Week 2.
There are two games Friday, and I’m taking one of them: the Arizona Wildcats +7 at Kansas State for two important reasons: My brother went to U of A (briefly), and we just had an Athletic feature on two Wildcats, quarterback Noah Fifita and his top receiver Tetairoa McMillan, who both turned down the chance to transfer to play for the love of the game and definitely not money in good ol’ Tucson. Let’s check the lede of that story:
TUCSON, Ariz. – After the four-digit code is punched in and the gate whirs open, there’s one last bit of direction from the voice on the other end of the line.
“It’s the last house on the right,” Noah Fifita says. “Where the BMW is.”
That beats the description of my house junior year: “It’s at the top of the hill with the couch on the porch.” I love the new era of college football.
Also on Saturday, I’ll take Alabama -16.5 at Wisconsin and Pitt +2 at home against WVU in the Backyard Brawl. If you need me Saturday, I’ll be at a sportsbook wearing my throwback Biggie Goldberg Pitt jersey. (Look him up.)
Who do you like this Sunday in the big boy games?
JACKSON: One jumps off the page to me, and that’s the Titans +3.5 at home vs. the Jets. The Jets are on a short week, never had the ball Monday night at San Francisco and gave up scores on eight straight possessions. The Titans collapsed after leading 17-0 in Chicago, and this isn’t really a bet that the Titans are ready to be a good team. It’s a bet that the Jets are still a bad team, and I’ll take the points.
The Packers are starting Malik Willis, who’s been in Green Bay about three weeks. But a full field goal at home? I’ll take the Packers +3 against the Colts, who are interesting but, to me, are not yet any kind of finished product.
And finally, Under 41.5 in Browns-Jags. Just a slugfest, probably a punt fest, and I definitely think both coaches view it as a first to 17 (20 max) type of game between 0-1 teams.
For my NFL survivor pick, I’ll take the Ravens.
GREENBERG: Since I’m taking three college games, I’ll go easy on the NFL with a two-fer:
I’ll start with the Chargers -6 over the Panthers. Who’s got it better than Jim Harbaugh’s team? This week, no one, because the Panthers are going to be bad … again. Too bad the Bears only have their second-round pick this year, instead of another first. The Chargers are a monster public team this week, which worries me. But the public was on the money last week. While I do think this game could be close, San Diego, I mean, Los Angeles wins by a touchdown.
I’ll also take the Bengals +5.5. If anybody has a blueprint to slow down Patrick Mahomes, it’s Bengals defensive coordinator Lou Anarumo. The Bengals flat-out stunk last week, and obviously, as someone who picked the Bengals to win the AFC North, I’m worried about the state of the pass game. But I’ll take the points here in hopes that Joe Burrow is sharper and the desperate Bengals play like they need this one.
My survivor team is the Eagles on MNF.
Zac Jackson’s picks
Jon Greenberg’s picks
(Photo of Shedeur Sanders: Andrew Wevers / Getty Images)
