Bachelor Nation’s Sarah Herron has been beyond candid about her and fiancé Dylan Brown’s journey to parenthood, and she has no plans to slow down her dreams of starting a family — or stop sharing the ups and downs.
“We are gonna do an embryo transfer in October, and if we do not have a successful pregnancy by the end of the year, we’re talking with Dr. Aimee [Eyvazzadeh] about either doing another egg retrieval or considering egg donor or embryo donor,” Herron explained on Us Weekly’s “Here for the Right Reasons” podcast. “We’re gonna use the last of our embryos and then if we don’t have a pregnancy by the end of the year, [we’re] either kind of back to the drawing board or plan B, plan C and so on.”
Herron noted that she and Brown are keeping their options open.
“Fortunately, since I was able to successfully carry a pregnancy — the loss of Oliver had nothing to do with my uterus or my ability to carry him — so because of that, we feel confident that I would be able to carry another pregnancy to term. So most likely surrogacy is not necessary unless we reach a point where [of] fatigue,” she explained. “If I’m just like, ‘I can’t do this to my body anymore,’ then we might consider a surrogate. But right now, my uterus is capable, we’ll probably keep giving it a shot.”
Herron added that “there are so many ways to start your family,” including surrogacy, adoption and foster care.
“We’ll see where the wind blows us, but I think right now the best way to chew it off in bite-size pieces is like, ‘Let’s just see if we have a pregnancy by the end of the year. And if we don’t, we’ll cross that bridge when we get there,’” she said, adding that while the couple are lucky to have resources, they do not have “endless financial” funds.
She explained, “Some people can, you know, keep throwing spaghetti at the wall for 10 years, see what sticks, and that will not be the case for us. [We set a] financial ceiling when we started all of this. And we’re like, ‘This is where we’ll go. And if we reach that ceiling, then we pursue other options.’”
Herron and Brown began their family journey in 2020, attempting to get pregnant “the good old-fashioned way.” After six or seven months of trying, Herron went in for fertility testing and learned that she has diminished ovarian reserve.
“Essentially that just means my egg count and the reserve of my eggs is a little bit lower than a woman my age,” she told Us, noting that they started working with Dr. Aimee a.k.a the Egg Whisperer. “Exactly a year ago, I was finally very successful in getting pregnant. My first and only pregnancy ever was with our son, Oliver, who we, unfortunately, lost when I was about 25 weeks pregnant. So that was, as you can imagine, the hardest thing I’ve ever been through [and I’m] still going through it.”
Herron and Brown announced Oliver’s birth and death in February.
“I’ve been in therapy once a week for the last four years consistently. And when we lost Oliver, Dylan and I both started seeing a grief counselor together,” Herron told Us. “Seeing a grief-specific counselor was really key because she knew how to walk that path with us a little bit. But the interesting thing about grief and the way men and women approach it — a mother and father, it’s different. Just fundamentally [and] biologically, it’s going to be different. Dylan did not carry the child in his body. I did. I grew a biological connection with my son. And so the grieving is gonna be different for me than it is for him. And it’s pretty common for men or partners who are not carrying the baby to handle it [differently] or grieve faster, we could say. It doesn’t mean that Dylan is right or wrong, it’s just his grief is different and mine is gonna be different.”
The Bachelor season 17 alum continued, “It’s really hard on couples. And so keeping that line of communication open and making sure that you’re both still either in counseling or supporting yourself emotionally is really important. It can make or break relationships — I won’t sugarcoat it. It’s really important that both individuals seek the care that they need.”
Amid her IVF journey, Herron has also turned to Facebook groups for support. After losing Oliver, she started her own support group called Infertile Circle.
“I just wanted to create something that was not me trying to be an expert, not me trying to be a therapist. It’s just a peer support group. And I tell the women in the group that it’s just as much for me as it is [for] them,” Herron told Us. “Truly, like, two weeks ago, I just broke down and cried in front of everyone and they rallied around me and supported me and it’s really beautiful. We all text each other now, ‘Hey, thinking of you, you’ve been on my mind this week.’ And that’s all it really is — just to provide support. I keep it small and intimate.”
Herron describes the group as program based.
“You get brought in as a group of 15 for five weeks and you develop really, really personal relationships in that five weeks. And then, of course, there’s a Facebook group that everyone has access to forever, ongoing should they choose,” she said. “But for those five weeks, we meet on Zoom and we text and we all lived in the same city or state, I’m sure we’d get together in person. But right now, we’re all across the U.S. and in Canada.”
She concluded, “It’s the worst club with the best members and there is a whole universe of women who are going through this and who are there to support you if you feel you need support or encouragement through your path to parenthood and beyond.”
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For even more from Herron, listen to her full chat with Us Weekly on the “Here for the Right Reasons” podcast.